“Positive reframing” – what we do when we remind people to be grateful and look on the bright side may actually be making things worse.

Inspired by a recent article by David Brooks, it’s better to “hear, respect and love the person” – to show you haven’t given up on them or walked away.

That is powerful stuff not only for those suffering from discouragement or even depression but for those of us looking for the right words to a help support a friend.