Not Dwelling on the Past

Think of the past as a file that we retrieve but must return to its proper place to avoid living there permanently.

The future is where we go to plan, a necessary journey but one that still requires that we return to the present to get it started and see it through.

The present is all we are guaranteed – it’s where we live, it’s what we have and it’s the best place to reside.

If you liked this DayStarter, go ahead and share it.

Subscribe to DayStarters

Multiplying Productivity

Teachers divide their year into two semesters, coaches often divvy the season up into smaller sections where they can start fresh if things don’t go the right way.

Dividing can multiply productivity.

The reason most people choose to do the easy things on their to-do list is because they don’t take long to complete even if more consequential time-consuming things remain neglected.

The trick is to divide the larger, more complex and usually more impactful things in life into smaller more bit-sized tasks.  This is what super achievers do because it is human nature to put off large projects because they take more time than most people have.

Are we working smart or working to harvest the easy stuff first?

If you liked this DayStarter, go ahead and share it.

Subscribe to DayStarters

Phone Addiction

I forgot my phone the other day – left the house without it, went about my business and for some odd reason I was so busy or distracted that I didn’t notice.

I did have my watch on with email and other capabilities but, apparently, I didn’t look at it while I was out.

When I returned, I sat down, reached into my pocket when I realized that I must have lost my phone (I didn’t). The panic of being separated from my phone was real and I don’t have to tell you the thought was terrifying.

Then when I found it being charged, I felt proud that I could leave the house without it and survive.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not going to do this again or say how great it felt to be away from constant contact.

But I did learn something.

I can live without my phone, but my phone can’t live without me.

It works for me not the other way around.

If you liked this DayStarter, go ahead and share it.

Subscribe to DayStarters

Brightening a Dark Mood

After my daughter’s wedding, my wife Cheryl and I were stressed so we attended an 8-hour stress-free living seminar with Mayo Clinic physician Dr. Amit Sood in Phoenix – not a moment too soon.

He started by telling the assembled group that we need to meditate at which point I raised my hand and said I have tried and can’t do it – many other attendees attested to the same thing.

Dr. Sood was not referring to the process of meditation where you empty your mind but instead the type he espoused where you fill it with thoughts of joy and gratitude.

What is it about gratitude that is the best “drug” available for what ails us.

Today, as I share this moment, I can reaffirm that when things go south – problems, stress, the feeling of being overwhelmed, the simple act of thinking about both who and what you are grateful for, can go a long way to brightening a dark mood.

If you liked this DayStarter, go ahead and share it.

Subscribe to DayStarters

Bullying Baseball Cards

I learned to hate bullying when I was a young teenager and the bully of my neighborhood somehow got me to part with some of the best parts of my baseball card collection to trade for his lesser ones.

His name was Butch, you can’t make this stuff up.

To this day, I can feel the pain, the loss and the embarrassment of being snookered out of one of my youthful prized possessions.

The bullying didn’t stop there and when it became physical, I picked myself up and went crying to my mother who told me to go out and push him back – it worked.

He was so much bigger.  I was so skinny but it really had nothing to do with that.

Bullying doesn’t just happen to kids – I see it all the time in the radio industry where powerbrokers are vicious in their handling of underlings.

What I learned about bullying 101 was it has nothing to do with size or brute force, it’s all about standing strong at which point the bully looks for another victim.

If you liked this DayStarter on bullies, go ahead and share it.

Subscribe to DayStarters

Avoiding Fatigue (You’ve Never Heard This Way Before)

I always thought that fatigue was tied to diet or exercise – maybe stress.

It turns out that there is new thinking that kind acts created by you also helps feed the emotional appetite for sustenance.

There are three ways to create kindness which after it is shown to others, stays with you.

  1. Sending silent good wishes to people when you see them without a word being spoken.
  2. Random acts of kindness often make the enabler even happier than the target if that is possible.
  3. Focus on someone who needs you, your attention and your ability to listen not yourself. 

Replay your acts of kindness even when no one is around and you need a boost.

If this DayStarters has been forwarded to you by a friend, you can start receiving a new one every day here.

Getting Over Disappointment

Years ago, I was hired to become program director of a Chicago radio station after an in-person interview that went very well – I had the qualifications and the motivation.

I flew back to Philly planning the on-air changes I would make, I couldn’t wait to move and get started but it never came to that.

I never heard from the general manager who hired me – his name was Charles Manson, no kidding, perhaps I should have known – and I was shipwrecked for months.

What did I do wrong?  Things went so well.  Was it something I said – he hired me on the spot and then this.  It made no sense.

What I didn’t know then was that the job I wanted so badly was not meant for me – there was something better.

I started a media publication for which I was a natural, after all, I had already programmed radio stations why not something different – I just couldn’t see it at the time.

As strange as it sounds disappointment has its virtues but be patient, something better is bound to come your way and exceed your expectations.

If this DayStarters has been forwarded to you by a friend, you can start receiving a new one every day here.

Discovering New Ways to Build Confidence

Ever wonder when things go your way, you feel like you can do no wrong and when they don’t, you feel like you can barely do anything right.

A hot streak is contagious, a losing streak seems to be never ending.

Doubling down on effort makes little difference – of course you will do anything to regain confidence to make the good times return.

Confidence comes when we let it come to us not when we pursue it. 

Focus on past successes, times when you’ve overcome adversity, your strength not weakness, your resolve not fears.

Ironically, confidence can’t be trapped, we must create the circumstances to have it find us.

The Advantages of Failure

I was a Dale Carnegie Course instructor for 11 years and we often pointed out to class members wishing to learn to speak on their feet that from all surveys, people feared speaking in public more than death.

Now things have changed.

The number one fear according to a new Men’s Health poll is fear of failure – and again, second to death.

The advantages of failure outweigh the disadvantages.

Every misstep is an opportunity to learn.

An opportunity to test yourself to see how badly you really want what you’re chasing.

You find out who your friends really are.

And you must be developing more self-confidence because trying a second or third time shows you’ve got the guts to keep at it.

Success is not the only goal – learning about how you handle temporary setbacks is far more valuable in the long run.

If this DayStarters has been forwarded to you by a friend, you can start receiving a new one every day here.

When You Need a Second Life

I recall reading most of Viktor Frankl’s book Man’s Search for Meaning on a Jersey beach so far north you could see the financial district in Manhattan on the other side.

Nine short months after Frankl was freed from a concentration camp, he wrote this:

Live as if you were living for the second time.

To me that meant every crisis presents an opportunity.

Today, every problem is not just an irritation but an invitation to live better the second time.

If this DayStarters has been forwarded to you by a friend, you can start receiving a new one every day here.