Kareem Abdul-Jabbar used to hold the NBA record for the most points in a basketball game until February 8 when Lebron James broke the record by pushing to 38,390 points.

Kareem certainly is not feeling bad about himself – his record came before the 3-point shot among other things.

Many have a bad habit of comparing themselves to others.

Do that and you always lose.

Not because it’s inherently true but because it’s an unfair matchup – like Kareem and Lebron.

Barry Bonds holds the record for the most homeruns in a season (73 in 2001) and the most career homeruns at 762 – but there was a controversy about enhancing drugs, a faster baseball.

Your friend who got the job, the promotion or the life you thought you wanted means nothing.

Comparing yourself to someone else is self-sabotage.

From now on compare yourself to only one person – you.

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You (not me)

Proud (like in I’m proud of you)

That must have been difficult (compassion not advice to people who are hurting)

Can

Will

Never give up

Words matter.  Negative words create a narrative of future failure.  Every time you say them you are rehearsing a bad outcome.

Powerful words motivate, inspire and reward to create a path to happiness and success.

Choose your words carefully.

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Confidence can’t be outsourced.

It starts from within.

Spending any time at all doubting ourselves is a waste of time.

When we look to others for the confidence we don’t have, it never works.

Believe in you.

Never look to others for the confidence you feel you are lacking.

To do so makes you co-dependent on another and when their support is no longer there, we find ourselves searching again for self-confidence.

Erase a lifetime of doubt by retraining your brain to believe in you.

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Americans check their phones once every 4 minutes.

Spend 26 seconds on average reading online content.

The young spend an hour and a half per day on TikTok.

It takes 10 seconds to choose a YouTube video.

The key question that helps you to gain control of your digital devices and social apps is:  “How EXACTLY does this device, this app, this program, this game, this podcast make your life better or happier?”

Answer that and you are back in control with time to spare.

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The duty of a real friend may not be listening and giving advice or cheer a person up. 

It’s to acknowledge the reality of the situation.

Hear, respect and love the person.

Show that you haven’t given up on them.

Haven’t walked away.

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What if I told you that you were going to get the job of your dreams, make nice money, have a special person in your life and enjoy less stress – interested?

The reason we fear the future is because we have become caught up expecting the WORST even when we are doing our BEST.

The future is a journey – like a vacation, it is not to be feared.

If you want to have a new appreciation for the unforeseen ahead in the future, talk to a person who has run out of years on this earth – wouldn’t they take an uncertain future over no future at all?

From today on, vow to look for all the good things that have not yet happened instead of fearing what will likely never happen.

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The best answer for someone who doesn’t care, is someone who does.

It’s a waste to try and convince such a person to become more invested in what they are doing but that doesn’t usually stop us from trying.

A better use of time is to look for someone who cares.

They will become an ally.

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There are 3 usual responses.

Panic, deny and run.

Or rise to the task.

Every opportunity changes the way the brain is wired.

Being committed to act decisively and without fear is a rehearsal for overcoming the problem.

Most people get undone when something goes wrong.

But imagine if you are ready to respond before something goes wrong.

Less fear, no denial and never panic.

Anticipate the worst to be ready to do your best.

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When a baseball player makes an out – even strikes out, no matter what they feel when they walk back to the dugout, they can’t wait to bat again.

That’s how we should do it.

Fail and get back and try again but with one big difference.

Relish the opportunity.

Even if it leads to the same result.

It’s not how many times we try.

It’s how we relish each attempt.

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Instead of giving up chocolate or fasting give up self-neglect 

That’s what Columbia Theological Seminary professor Chanequa Walker-Barnes is doing to reverse the usual Lenten practices.

Committing to healthy eating, yoga, meditation, making do with what she had instead of getting something new.

Self-care is a workaround for the neglect of living in a demanding world that deemphasizes mental wellness.

Sacrifice has its place and adding psychologically healthy practices can also be beneficial.

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