Few things are more powerful than friendships, but when we feel betrayed by a friend, there is great hurt and the feeling of loss.
After all, we often wind up blaming ourselves rightly or wrongly.
The closer we are with others, the more vulnerable we become.
So I have a 4 step road to recovery that I would like to share with you. This applies to anyone of any age and is particularly useful with children who are devastated when they feel betrayal for the first time.
- First and fast determine if the perceived betrayal is a misunderstanding. Once emotions take over it is harder to resolve the misunderstandings we all have in life.
- Accept apologies. Not harboring anger is what friends really do. Forgiveness does not always mean forgetting.
- If they feel as badly as you do, consider reaching out to see things from their perspective.
- Ask yourself if you want to remain friends with the person who betrayed you. All healing is painful but it can also be beneficial. Sometimes moving on is the best option.
Adversity can actually strength friendships as George Washington pointed out:
“True friendship is a plant of slow growth, and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity before it is entitled to the appellation.”
We earn the right to be a friend.
I love this definition of a true friend:
“Your friend is the man (person) who knows all about you, and still likes you.” (Elbert Hubbard)
Thanks for sharing these daily thoughts with people you care about and please feel free to keep the conversation going by making a comment below.