Toxic Friends

Adversity introduces a person to him or herself and to those around them.

A true friend is to be highly valued.

So why are we valuing people who have proven to disappoint?

  • Never take advice from people who accomplish little.
  • Never seek the advice of someone who is unable to sincerely emphasize and who is unlikely to contribute a positive solution.
  • Avoid taking advice from someone you don’t admire and respect.

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Assume You Can Do It

Confident people always seem to be ready to do almost anything.

But when we are exposed to negativity, we become less confident.

Shakespeare said “assume a virtue if you have it not” and here’s how that works in our modern lives.

Saying “I can’t” or “I don’t think so” is you hurting yourself.  Why do that?

All we have to give is 100% of what we have – everyone can do this.  No exceptions.

When in doubt, think about something else you did that took courage even if it wasn’t similar.

Create IOUs to yourself for bravely doing things you didn’t think you could do and cash them in the next time you’re challenged.

Fear of failure is worse than failing from trying.

Banish that thought.

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Difficult Days

Adversity sucks.

But it has its virtues.

The way we handle hard times can be transformative.

We constantly look for an end to our difficulties that is why adversity seems to never end.

Recognizing progress makes difficult days when nothing seems to go right better.

Surviving the last few hours – progress.

Coming up with a plan of action – that deserves a pat on the back.

Waking up the next day and attacking your problem anew – progress we often fail to recognize.

It’s progress that allows us to deal with adversity.

Measuring progress transforms us from poor victim to handler of life’s ups and downs.

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Confidence in a Hurry

It’s easy to forget your many successes in a fast-paced world.

If you want to constantly doubt yourself, keep focusing on what you think is wrong with you.

If you want to gain confidence, celebrate every success big and small.

Start a notes file on your phone. 

Every time you have a success or accomplishment, add it to the list (latest first).

Scroll down often during the day and review all the things that you have accomplished.

It’s a human condition to think about faults rather than accomplishments, but people who exude confidence make it a commitment and daily ritual to remind themselves of what’s right about them.

You are the best source of confidence.

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Letting Go of the Past

Think of how much time we waste trying to rewrite the history of our lives.

Regretting past mistakes.

Holding on to anger.

It’s almost as if we’re trying to engineer a better past or future.

What we’re living now is the only thing that is guaranteed. It’s the only thing we have for certain.

It deserves 100% of our attention.

The past is an old file that we pull to learn lessons and then put it away.

The future is a blueprint for anticipating a future – glance at it and return to now.

Spend most of your time in the present where life happens and where you can fix past mistakes and hope for better days ahead.

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